Planning an open house and climbing a mountain feel oddly similar to me.
Sweaty palms.
Second-guessing every decision.
Feeling exhausted before you even start.
Party planning is not my gift. The weeks leading up to our assisted living open house felt like I needed hiking poles, trail mix — and maybe a Sherpa.
June 22, 2022 arrived anyway.
I convinced a local radio station to feature us (bless their free small business support) and invited family, friends, and anyone remotely connected to senior care.
“If ten people show up, I’ll call it a win,” I told myself.
Meanwhile, Rafael was in full survival mode.
While I was networking and pretending I knew what I was doing, he was knee-deep in finish work. You know the kind — the tiny details that look easy but consume your soul. Trim that wouldn’t sit right. A door with opinions. A toilet paper holder staging a full rebellion.
Somewhere between a nail gun and a reference check, we questioned our life choices.
Then… people came.
Neighbors. Friends. Community members.
They toured the home, smiled, and encouraged us. And for the first time, it didn’t feel like Rafael and me versus the world.
It felt like a village.
One week later, our first resident moved in.
Exhaustion and joy collided. The doors were open. The dream was alive.
But here’s the truth no one tells you
Opening the doors is the easy part.
Filling them with life, dignity, and meaning?
That’s the real climb.
And here’s why I’m telling you this — because if you’re caring for an aging parent, you’re probably standing at the bottom of your own mountain right now.
You may not be opening an assisted living home…
But you are navigating decisions you never trained for.
Housing. Safety. Care needs. Family dynamics.
And most days, it feels like you’re doing it in flip-flops.
Care partnering often starts before you feel “ready.”
Most care partners I talk to don’t feel prepared when the journey begins.
They feel:
- Behind before they start
- Afraid of making the wrong choice
- Pressured to decide quickly without clear guidance
And just like our open house, the outside may look calm — while internally, everything feels uncertain.
That’s why clarity beats urgency every time.
Before you make big moves, it helps to slow the chaos just enough to see the path ahead.
This is where a simple planning tool can change everything.
Before your next major care decision, give yourself clarity first.
Feeling unsure if it’s time to start planning for more support? Our Care Readiness Checklist walks you through the key signs in daily life, health, and safety so you can make decisions with clarity — before a crisis hits.
Download Your Free Care Readiness Checklist Here
You don’t need to climb the whole mountain today
When Rafael and I opened our home, we didn’t have everything figured out.
What we did have was a next step.
That’s the part most care partners miss — you don’t need the full plan.
You need the next right step.
If senior living is part of your path, preparation matters even more. Touring communities without a plan can leave you overwhelmed and unsure afterward.
If that’s where you are right now, the Visit Prep Checklist can help you walk in calm, confident, and focused — not rushed or pressured.
You’re not failing — you’re just early in the climb
If you liked this story, you may also want to read:
“The Day We Said Yes…”
It’s another story about how Rafael and I walked away from “cookie-cutter care” for good, and how we got to where we are today.
Before You Go — A Note From Me
You’re carrying a lot
If this season feels heavy, confusing, or lonely — that makes sense. Care partnering rarely comes with a manual, and the emotional weight is real.
Why I do this work
I’m Shelley, a care partner advocate and the founder of HolistiCare. I’ve been on both sides — building care homes and walking families through hard decisions. Everything we create is rooted in real experience, not theory.
Start with one supportive tool
The Prepared Daughter Survival Kit helps you organize information, reduce repeated decisions, and feel steadier as things evolve.
Get Your Prepared Daughter Kit Today
What to do next
Not sure where to go from here? These may help:
- Read more care partner stories on the blog
- Subscribe for weekly blog notifications
- Join our monthly newsletter for practical guidance
Care partnering can feel isolating, but you’re not alone. Join our community of care partners navigating this journey together.
Thank you for being here — and for showing up for someone you love.
Your partner in care,
Shelley
