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Shelley Pillado 
She didn’t say it angrily.She said it almost to herself—like a realization that came too late. “They told me dehydration can cause UTIs.It sure would have been nice to know that some time ago.Mom really struggles to drink water.” This was after at least four hospitalizations for UTIs. Four. This Is How Families Get Blindsided … Read more
There’s a reason people love Patti.And no, it’s not because she’s loud, flashy, or trying to work the room. In fact, it’s the opposite. Patti is genuine. She listens. Really listens. Not the polite nod-and-smile kind, but the kind where you feel seen, remembered, and cared about long after the conversation ends. She’s the friend … Read more
(It Means Trusting What Comes Next) What does letting go really mean for you?Why does it pull at us so deeply? Is it the fear of the unknown?Or maybe the sense of failure?Or even the worry that this time… maybe you won’t bounce back? The truth is, letting go—even when we know it’s the right … Read more
(And What It Taught Me About Caring) I used to think being strong meant not crying. But one day, I opened a freezer door and everything changed. I never expected to cry in the freezer aisle at the grocery store. Have you ever been blindsided by grief in the most ordinary place? I was so … Read more
(And What Most People Do Wrong) Mom had an appointment.I came over early to help her get ready, because getting ready is a thing now. It takes forever. She can’t stay on task. That morning, though, things were actually going well. She was dressed. Shoes on. Purse ready. All that was left was brushing her … Read more
She Changed Everything. Her name was Gladys. ∞ ∞ ∞ Her eyes were soft with a voice was strong, though worn by years of living.You could still see pieces of who she had been, even as dementia slowly took them away. When Families Arrive Exhausted But in many ways, the ones who carried the weight … Read more
(And What Does) Yes, They Can Still Learn—Here’s How to Reach Them Many people are surprised to hear this, but it’s true: People with dementia can still learn. They just learn differently. Instead of learning through words and explanations, they learn through the senses, much like young children do. Some parts of the brain change, … Read more
She called me Mom again today. “Mom, what should we do next? What do we still need to do?” Her voice floated across the kitchen table, soft and earnest, like someone trying to find their footing in a room that suddenly feels bigger than they remember. And even though this isn’t the first time, it … Read more
Until It’s Too Late. And by the time they realize what to ask, the damage is already done. Most families don’t make bad decisions.They make uninformed decisions — under pressure. Not because they didn’t care.Not because they ignored warning signs.But because no one ever told them there were rules to learn in the first place. … Read more
Planning an open house and climbing a mountain feel oddly similar to me. Sweaty palms.Second-guessing every decision.Feeling exhausted before you even start. Party planning is not my gift. The weeks leading up to our assisted living open house felt like I needed hiking poles, trail mix — and maybe a Sherpa. June 22, 2022 arrived … Read more
